So recently, (we already knew Diesel was evil...and yes his name MAY have been inspired by the malicious band of trains in the Thomas the Train series) my "relationship" with Diesel as was (casual dating etc.) went from holding hands and public and snuggling at night, to being ignored for a week and *OH THE KICKER* finding out from FACEBOOK that he's in a relationship with another girl. Free bonus? It tells me they started dating December 13th...before he even contacted me at all. Now, I knew this guy was a jerk and thought it was a maturity delay...come to find the bastard has not one scrap of integrity. In retrospect, I feel he did me a favor by bowing out- who needs someone like that!?
Unfortunately, these events- having severely impacted my self esteem, especially after noting Diesel girl's fake tan and bleached over-processed hair- lowered my man filter, and in snuck Astro Lux. Now, the real gem of this information is that that is a self-inflicted pseudonym. I generally delight in creating them, but really none could top what this character in question had created for himself as a facebook name. I suppose if there is a real piece de resistance of this story, it would be that he randomly friended me and started facebook chatting me a few months ago...and I finally ran into him last week completely randomly at Christian's Pizza at 1 am. Ugh. After survivor hour + 5 more drinks, chatting him up seemed like such a good idea. After Astro Lux explained to me last week that he prefers to be "inclusive" (aka be in open relationships with multiple people at the same time), I successfully avoided him and ignored a weekend text message. Hush: 1. Astro Lux (haha, I can't even type that without laughing...): 0. At any rate, yesterday he sensed weakness and rushed in for the jugular. I may have agreed to meet up at bars this weekend. Hopefully surrounded by a posse so deep he can't find me.
Clearly, this chain of events necessitated a night out at bars with friends and multiple rounds of G&Ts. Sidenote: channeling my good friend Hannah (hope you're reading this- love you!), I felt an overwhelming need last night to move from bar to bar in a joyous skipping, dancing fist-to-the ground pumping motion. Imagine a sort of tribal dance of the drunken hero. There was lots of hopping, butt bumping, and low kicking involved too. Reflecting on this, I realize my friends are very tolerant people and allowed me my fun sans comment.
We arrive eventually at Baja Bean for karaoke and sign up for, what I believe I wrote down as the Spicy Girls. Fresh. Enter (stage right): Busta (it was karaoke...you riddle it out), an eager beaver JAG school UVA Law alum. Anyone who runs at 4am carrying a deadly weapon and wearing combat boots is automatically insane, I'm sorry. (For those of you who never rowed crew at UVA and did not have the pleasure of getting up at 4:30am for morning workouts on the reservoir, JAG-ers do this like 3 times a week rain or shine and it looks excruciatingly un-enjoyable). And Busta was a toucher. A close talking, arm patting, shoulder rubbing toucher...GA I just met you dude, stay in your bubble, yea? Alas, he had good teeth, I was still feeling the need for validation after the Diesel trauma... agreeing to give him my number seemed like a good plan at this juncture. To Kelly, Willa, and Erin: I tip my hat, you tried to stop it. *Sigh*
On a more positive note, Blade was in fact coaxed out to bars. The aforementioned ladies and I had worked out a series of basic hand signals so they could let me know whether they thought he was attractive or not (they never agree with my taste). A simple hand motion around the ocular area was all that was necessary to indicate that yes in fact, he is hott. Trying to keep myself together became impossible, when I looked over at Kelly for "the signal" and she was rubbing her temple so vigorously, had it not looked so ridiculous I might have been worried. At least we were all in agreement.
Expect updates after Saturday. Forseeable hijinks in the near future!
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